John 13:7

"You do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand." ~ john 13:7

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Hearts & Ivy

It has become something I am learning to expect from God. Seeing Him through the ordinary. Looking for Him in the extraordinary. And that's exactly where He showed up today. As I sat on our couch, in our newly 'decorated' living room...I glanced at the bookshelf that now sits in front of our window. It looks really nice there because the plants are on the top shelf where they can receive good light and we can see them better. I noticed the light coming from behind an ivy that is there. I really like ivy. Come to think of it...I captured one of my favorite pictures of ivy soon after we arrived in Hong Kong. It's one that has ivy woven through a barbed-wire fencing. It caught my eye when we were strolling behind the school one day on our way to the church. It's now my profile picture on my Schoology account. Did I mention that I liked ivy?

Back to the ivy in our den...
I just had to grab my camera and take a few snapshots of this ivy..and I'm quite sure you can tell why. It's the perfect combination for me - hearts in nature...handmade by my Creator for my eyes to see.
I believe God enjoys taking something as simple as an ivy leaf to remind us just how much He is with us, and how much His love for us is beyond our comprehension. I may never be able to grasp how big, how wide, nor how deep He loves me...but there is one thing I can grasp... That is how He is here & there & everywhere. How He's before, behind, above, and below. Always with me, always for me..and never going away.

Finding meaning in a Tree

As I look out the window of our cozy
little den on the first floor, Flat B, for some of the final glimpses of the tree I've grown to love... I see something worth noting in my heart. Once again God has shown me a life lesson through His Creation we call Nature.

Just glancing at the tree, I might just see...well, a tree in the middle of a concrete jungle. But with a closer look & my mind quieted from the noises of life.. I begin to really look at that tree. It's a metaphor of a person. It could be me. I have to examine this thought.

The center of the tree is what my eyes are drawn to. The very center, which by contrast, is unlike the rest of the tree. It isn't green with flourishing leaves. Instead it's brown. Brown with decay & death. I begin to think of the tree as a person. The very center, or core if you will, being the heart.

Giving in to the pains, disappointments and frustrations of our lives over time can cause our hearts to decay. Just recently I had a discouraging, disappointing moment. It was just that. It only took a millisecond of my time. But the lasting effects could cause a huge shift in my life...if I let it. I am quite certain the person causing this has no clue what effect their action has had on me. But if I allow their action and my disappointment to take root in my heart...I know it will be like the brown leaves in the center of that tree. If I let any seeds of bitterness start to grow and I water it with my emotions, then I know where my heart will end up. That's a real temptation for me. I know because that's a real area of sin for me. And guess what? Satan knows it, too. His plan for me would be to dwell on the disappointments so that my heart won't get the nourishment I need from a loving God, and soon it would grow cold, bitter and angry. Just like the way I see the center of that tree.
I have to fight that temptation..and with help I can do it. Alone I don't stand a chance. My Savior came for just these kinds of reasons. To help my heart stay green & flourishing. To help me keep it watered in His love & His Word..which is Truth.

So His revelation out my window this early morning (almost my last here in this tiny, beautiful flat)... has reminded me to see clearly the battle within. Thank you, Jesus, for the picture you've given my heart this day. The good news? You are with me. You are for me. You will help me overcome because you overcame. You've already won, you reign victorious. And you share your victory with me.

"Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life."
Proverbs 4:23

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Must love trees

I've decided I must have something for trees. It seems God reveals much about my life through them. There's one in particular just outside my den window that I've been noticing lately. I think the love affair began the first morning we arrived in Hong Kong...which was my first glimpse of the tree. Because we're on the first floor of our building, the part of the tree that we see is somewhere in the middle - where the trunk meets the branches & leaves. Right now..in the heat of the summer in Hong Kong...the greenery on this tree is amazing. It brings a sense of joy to me as I look at it.

This tree has become a part of me..a part of my story. I've studied it for the last 9 months - like an expectant mother - watching with great anticipation of the new life growing inside her..trying to understand every little movement. You might disagree, wondering what can someone gain from watching a grown tree outside her window. It's just 'there'.. But I can report that I've been able to see this tree live through such adversity in just a few months, I know God is growing me by its example. It was cold in the winter-time..and had to manage surviving without blanket or coat. It has survived the summer - HOT & HUMID conditions, relying on any rain (or cool drink from the landscape crew).
But the biggest trial I've seen thus far was surviving the T10 hurricane, Vicente, that  recently rolled through Hong Kong with the most fierce winds I have ever encountered. I sat and watched as the 140mph winds made this tree bend so much, that I seriously expected it to be uprooted by morning. I took a bus ride the morning following 'Vicente' ..and the sightings of huge trees down everywhere I looked made me realize what a strong tree this was - planted right outside my window. (Statistics stated more than 1000 trees fell in one night with the storm.)

"What is it that God wants me to learn from this tree?" - I began to wonder. I believe one important Truth is.. no matter what the trial may be.. HE is ALWAYS with me & will be until the end. I believe another Truth... Whatever the circumstances are (how much the winds of adversity try to break me).. if I am deeply rooted in my faith, my relationship with Christ and His infallible Word... Then I have NOTHING to fear. These are just two things I think He wants me to know about Him. I will continue to study that tree.. My tree. 

One thing I desire - to be like that tree - so deeply rooted that it doesn't matter what life brings to my door - Jesus is there waiting to see me through.

Truly HE is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken.
Psalm 62:6

HE is my Rock

Sunday, March 18, 2012

My Jesus Tree

Oh my.  It's been a while, dear friend.  Please forgive my absence.  Life is that way, isn't it?  We get busy with the busyness of everyday life - and before you know it.. a month has slipped by.  I've found that a 'dry spell' with God (for me) is a direct result of letting my life spin like a washing machine.  "But, Look God.. how busy I am running around doing good things!" - I say.  "Yes, I can see, dear one.. but spending time with Me is what I desire most, my beloved." - He responds. "ouch" (Note to self: Relationship with my Creator is what He wants from me.. n-o-t-h-i-n-g does He require.)

I want to share something that Jesus showed me here in Hong Kong. (First, a picture so you can get a visual)


This happened during a walk in the park across the busy street from our flat. (so many times I sense the Holy Spirit in that park)
It was, once again, on a day that I was feeling very far away from God - forgotten.  After dropping Brady off at school, I slowly walked back toward our building.  I decided to stop in the park on a bench and linger for a little while.. listening with my headphones to an artist - who always brings Jesus close to my heart.  While hearing her tender words, I glanced to a tree that is stationed right in the middle of the walking path.  It was that tree that was transformed into the likeness of a hand.  It was a picture of this hand, Jesus' hand stretched over, gently curved.  I'd walked under the branches of that hand - just seconds before sitting down.  Jesus was showing me that he is that close.  His hand covers me as I walk - protecting me from harm that I don't even know exists. What a beautiful picture of His love at the perfect time for my heart to see it.  Maybe He's trying to show it to you today, too.  Can you see?

* Take a look at the picture, again.  See the trunk as his left arm.. there's his thumb.. and the curved fingers outstretched toward the right.. the long, flowing fingers.  Call me crazy, but I'm crazy for Him.  And my heart needs to remember days like these when life gets too busy to ponder.

Maybe He's trying to show you His love somewhere out there in His creation we call nature.  Slow down long enough to ponder & look.  I think He's just waiting to amaze you... like He did me that day.. in the park.  I believe He wants to remind us that we are truly His beloved ~ and beautiful.

Link to the beautiful song I was listening to:
Beloved
Kari Jobe

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

They want...I need

One Sunday morning as Brady & I were walking (quickly) to church - we passed a group of local residents standing in front of a CLOSED phone store. There, peering into window, they stood -  looking at the items and discussing in Cantonese the phones that they wanted.

This image really made me wonder.  There are many things in this world to want...to wish for.  A new phone, a big house, a new wardrobe, a higher paying job, an education...the list is endless.  Yet - do we desire the most precious thing the Creator of our universe has given to us - free of charge?

Do we stand at the foot of the cross in the same way these Hong Kong neighbors stood before this store window?  These "throne of phones"?  I found myself answering that question with a more convicting question. Do I ever find myself before Jesus with a humbled heart - and in the same way these people stood before the desirable phones -  say - "I want...him." 

No, generally not.  Perhaps on an emotionally trying day I've cried to Jesus about my woes - pleading my case.  But to stand (or kneel) and desire him with all of me?  Not lately.  That's when I find myself mourning not only for myself - but for the gentle people here - who may not even know the same King as I do.  Oh, were they to know him.  Oh, were I more like him to share him.

One of my dearest friends gave me her Bible before we moved across 'the pond.'  This copy is so precious to me - not only because it's God's Word - but because she had magazine clippings  & devotionals taped to pages, as well as notes that she penned & scriptures that were special to her underlined.  I found a scripture that she marked...that's perfect.

I WILL PRAISE YOU, O LORD, WITH MY WHOLE HEART;
I WILL TELL OF ALL YOUR MARVELOUS WORKS.
I WILL BE GLAD & REJOICE IN YOU;
I WILL SING PRAISE TO YOUR NAME, O MOST HIGH.
~Psalm 9:1-2


Here is a song with wonderful lyrics.
I think it's a perfect ending to this post...
Magnificent Obsession

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Found in a flower



I thought I'd begin today's post with a picture of the park I walk through daily (4 times) taking Brady to and from her school.  This particular morning I was feeling really out of place.  We'd not been in Hong Kong but a short while and I couldn't help but feel as though we were living on the moon.  No matter where we walked - school, grocery store, mall, post office, the church - we wouldn't encounter anyone speaking our language.  I began to wonder why God brought me here, away from all the family that I dearly love, everything familiar to me.  What possible impact could I ever have on a city that held 7 million people - most of whom I couldn't even begin to share what Christ means to me. As I continued my journey back to our flat...God drew my attention to the greenery next to the fence.  My heart leapt in my chest.  There in the sea of green, hidden below - almost secretly, was a beautiful & vibrant pink flower.  One that I'd never seen before and didn't have a clue what type it was. (note to self: Remeber to praise all my friends in the states with knowledge of flowers. I only know they're pretty, colorful & masterpieces for our eyes from God's Hand.)


It became so crystal clear to me what God was speaking into my heart.  He reminded me that in this 'sea' of people from China... I was meant to be here.  Through my differences He will be able to shine  so others can see Him. Even though I may feel overwhelmed at the thought of seeming so small ~ I still am an integral part of the puzzle that He is piecing together...and as long as I am obedient to His calling on my life He will continue to use me to bring others to His throne & glory to Himself.

I shared all of this with Brady on our way home that afternoon.  A few days following this encounter with the Creator, Brady found two flowers where there once was one & her response...
"Look, Mom! Now there's the two of us."

Monday, January 9, 2012

Experiment: Joy!

I started an experiment on Friday, November 25, 2011. I will take today's post to elaborate for you, my friends. It has been a journey for me - this experiment - which has resulted in a wonderful self-discovery by God's Hand, of myself. (note to self: God doesn't have to bring me half-way around the globe to reveal something to me next time)

As I sat in my new home, here in Hong Kong.. an apartment flat on the first floor in block 8... I started a new way of journaling for the next 14 days. I began with a declaration & a prayer. (note to self: ALWAYS a good idea to begin something with prayer FIRST)

My declaration went something like this: From now on God (and I) will be in charge of my emotions. No more will I allow someone (or something) to rule my feelings/emotions. From this day forward I will let only God be in charge of my heart. And thus was born my 'Experiment: Joy!'

Day #1 included a reflection of my past - way back to being a child - a time when I was a happy person. I found that people would often comment on my optimism, my positive outlook, my happiness.  The next step was gratitude toward Jesus: "Thank you. By the work of Your sacrifice on the cross, the Holy Spirit is going to help me return to my optimistic, positive, happy self that You created in me. Amen."
I went on to say that only God and I would rule my emotions & control my surroundings along with my emotions/how I handle those surroundings. Where there's pessimism...I will interject happiness and encouragement! I ended day #1 with this statement: I will wake up happy because I am a child of God with Jesus by my side.

And for the next 14 days God showed me wonderful things: using my surroundings, like the gardens across the street... using scripture... using music...
I will use some of these in my next few posts. It's an exciting time in my life & I am happy to be sharing them with you. I hope by some way God can use me to bring encouragement & love to you. I've always wanted to be His vessel - just have to remain open, listening for His voice & watching for His gentle nudges.

I'll end today's post with the beginning of my journal entry 'Experiment: Joy! Day #2'...
Thank you, Jesus, for giving me Joy! Becoming the 'me' You designed me to be is so thrilling to my heart. No longer the insecure little girl afraid of failure. If You are for me - it doesn't matter who is against me... I am already a winner and loved!

I highly recommend listening to Kari Jobe's beautiful song: "You Are For Me"
*Whenever I feel life is beating me down - I turn this on.*